Home Alone

Spending the holiday alone

This week is Thanksgiving, the beginning of the holiday season and for many, it will be a day alone. And somehow, being alone on a holiday seems a whole lot more alone than your typical Thursday. If you are in that boat this year, I want to encourage you to make the day special not because you have to be alone, but because it is the perfect time to celebrate you, do some self-care and pampering. It’s a chance to have a great productive day that you can feel good about instead of wallowing in sadness or depression.

I want to say here, that I am in no way making light of the situation. Many are alone for very sad or traumatic reasons. But I have a few ideas that hopefully make the most of your day and leave you with a feeling good.

Make a Plan!

If you make a list of the things that you plan to do, set a time to do each thing. (At times when plans have changed or for some reason I couldn’t attend a family event or something that I was looking forward to, I would get depressed. When I get depressed, I want to do nothing, but sleep. By setting a time for each thing, I look forward to it and I stay on task. Even though, it is a somewhat relaxing day, this just helps me not to crawl in bed and wait for the day to pass.)

Prioritize Your Plan

Think about what you like to do or want to do and never seem to get to and schedule it during your day. (For me, this is writing, I wrote the first half of a novel 5 years ago while in the mountains for a month. I love love love writing, but it seems like such a treat for me, that I never do it. I always have meals to cook, a house to clean, laundry to do and I say that I will do it when all the other things are done, but the other things are never done. But, if I schedule it on a day when I am on my own, I will hold to my schedule and work on it for at least an hour.)

Pamper Yourself!

Take the time to have and enjoy that therapeutic bath, mani, pedi or dig out that expensive face mask that you’ve been saving and use it!

Make a Movie Date with Yourself!

Pick a movie that you want to see, and stream or pick it up at Redbox ahead of time. I would encourage you to choose a new movie. If you watch something that has sentimental value, it will bring up old memories and emotions that may leave you in a sad state and/or compound any depression that you may be fighting. For this “date” you will need snacks!!! Pick up whatever candy makes it a movie experience for you and of course, you will need popcorn! Get your favorite cozy blanket and pillow yourself a nest on the couch and settle in and enjoy the show! (Again-speaking from my own experience- this needs to be a timed event, watch the movie, and only the movie, and then turn the TV off. Allowing yourself to binge watch or just aimlessly watch whatever is on or starts after the movie, will just eat up your time and allow you to drift into aimless thought which will , if you are anything like me, result in me circling whatever happened to cause me to spend the day alone or I will just feel sorry for myself.) If I move along and have things scheduled, I will stay focused on all of the special things that I get to do for myself on this day.

Read!

Take some time to dive into that book that has been on your night stand for far too long, allow yourself the luxury of sinking into a good story and taking a break from everything else.

Pinterst.com

Encouragement, Motivation, Comfort, Hope, and Acceptance

Time yourself and stay focused ( a big challenge for me) but go to Pinterest and search these words and any others that describe either how you are feeling or what you feel is lacking. Make a board of any quotes that return in the search that speak to you. Feel free to print, to put them on your fridge or bathroom mirror to help you stay on the desired path. If you are crafty, Making a plaque or drawing with the quote might be another thing to add to your holiday schedule.

BibleGateway.com

Timed and focused again, but go to Bible Gateway and search these words again or words having similar meaning to find Bible verses that will speak to where you are or where you want to be. Again print or craft any that speak to your heart. I would encourage you to spend some time in reading and prayer when you find a passage that touches and/ or challenges you.

Nap!

Again- I cannot stress enough… timed, set an alarm, you want to be refreshed and spoiled not in a stooper of avoidance and depression, just putting your head in the sand until the time passes. I would suggest 20 to 30 minutes.

Treat Yourself!

Pick up or make that wonderful dessert or delicacy that you never allow yourself to have but you desperately love. Fully enjoy it and make an experience of it. Dim the lights, play your favorite music softly, light candles, use any fancy dishes that you have and save for special- and taste, smell, savor each and every bite. And this is the kicker- there is no guilt allowed on this day that is special just for you.

I hope that you will choose a few, one, or all of these things to do as you have this gift of a day to enjoy yourself. Have a Happy Thanksgiving and be try to appreciate time to spoil yourself even if this day is not what you thought it would be, wished it would be, or wanted it to be.

John 16:27a (ESV)

For the Father himself loves you, because you have loved me and have believed.

John 3:16 (ESV)

For God so loved the world, that He gave his only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life.